


Mistress of Death

by tvdplusriverdale



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-04-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:47:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 20,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22400539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tvdplusriverdale/pseuds/tvdplusriverdale
Summary: Geralt crosses paths with an assassin named Y/N, and after he saves her after she kills the beast he was being paid to kill, he finds out that the assassin he starts developing feelings for has a much darker life than he originally thought.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia & Reader, Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Reader
Comments: 13
Kudos: 150





	1. I’ve Been Fighting A War

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Geralt x assassin!reader / Geralt x half-elf!reader
> 
> Word Count: 3137
> 
> Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
> 
> Song: Bravado - Lorde / Simmer - Hayley Williams

— ‡ —

Death seemed to follow me wherever I went. It was there when I was born half human and half elf. It was there on my mother's death bed as she begged Ramerd Gamward the head of the Assassin's Guild to take me in when I was six years old. And it was there for every kill I made.

Gamward made it very clear to me at the start of my training that I was not wanted. That humans didn't want to claim me because of my elven heritage and vice versa. That the only place I was wanted was the Guild. He used that to hone my anger towards the world into a sharp blade.

He called in favors for some mages to teach me chaos and its power. I was taught the art of dance, so I'd light and swift on my feet. I was taught fighting by him himself, which included hand to hand combat and weaponry. His assassins were nothing but the best of the best and he made sure of that, and so he'd know each and every move we knew just in case we got any ideas. It was also how he kept all of us under his Guild and in check, the massive pile of debt from training us.

Despite the brutality that was embedded into each of us, he made sure that two codes were always followed or it'd be you that'd be hunted down next either by himself or another assassin, and those codes were no innocents and especially no children.

And that code was something I was grateful for.

I was dispatched on an abuser when I'd met the Witcher, Geralt of Rivia. I stopped at a small town on the way to my assignment and even through the townspeople didn't know exactly what it was that I did, they knew it was nothing good, and they didn't take well to both me and the Witcher being in town at the same time. So, it was when the town was rallying up to get the two of us out of their town, I met Geralt.

Geralt had arrived a day before I did, so as I'd just finished tying my horse Sonja to a hitching rail, villagers started coming out yelling. I huffed out a sigh, untied Sonja, and got back on. Just as I was turning to leave, I saw him being chased out of a tavern. I looked down at him as Sonja pasted him. His amber eyes were blazing with anger from being pushed out.

I dug my heel into Sonja's side, so she'd speed up, there was a forest not too far away from the town. I knew it was dangerous going into the woods due to the Witcher being in the town, but I was itching for a fight.

I found a lake so Sonja could get some water, I could clean up, and refill my water skins. I made quick work of it though so I could find a camp site with the sun still out, which was going to set soon.

It didn't take long for me to find the perfect clearing in the forest, perfect because it was neither too close to the lake or the road. By the time I got a camp set up and Sonja eating, it was twilight.

The forest began to come alive with the creatures of the night starting to wake up. I didn't dare to disarm myself; I only took off my Zefhar bow and arrows along with an elven sword but keep the weapons within reaching distance. The rest of my weapons left on me where all of the throwing knives strapped to my body, I made myself a walking armory not only for my dispatches but to protect myself from everyone else. Whether it was men just prying on women or humans prying on elves, I made sure that there would be a fight.

I took up more after elves than I did humans, the only feature I took up after from humans were my eyes. So, when a wolf howled, I was easily awoken from my light sleep due to my sensitive hearing.

I was moving so quickly and quietly that my sword and it's scabbard were placed on my belt and my arrows were already slung across my back, bow already in my hands and a sliver tipped arrow being knocked back by the time I got to my feet, there were more howls.

I stilled my breathing, letting my ears pick up the slightest of sounds. It didn't take long for me to pick up on an animal breathing that wasn't Sonja's. I swiftly turned around and zeroed in on the wolf, its eyes glowing in the dark. Within a breath, the wolf is lunging towards me and my arrow is flying. The arrow struck the beast in its eye, with a howl of pain the wolf was down. More howls responded about a mile away, I move quickly to unsheathe the elven sword I carried and cut the wolves head off for good measure. 

I spare a moment to go and untie Sonja from a tree and glace over at her who was standing still, eyes on me waiting for me to give her the command to run. This wasn't her first time dealing with something like this and even though I knew it sounded crazy, we a had a mutual agreement that if I was to yell run or go down, she was to save herself. 

It wasn't that long after I could hear the sound of the wolf pack getting closer. I walk back over to the middle of the clearing, facing away from Sonja and towards the area the wolves were coming from. I stab the sword into the soft ground next to me and draw another arrow. I seen their eyes - five sets of them - before I seen their bodies moving quickly towards me, an arrow was flying through the air and another was already drawn by the time that the first one struck a wolf down. The second arrow brought another down, instead of drawing another arrow, I threw the bow far enough away that it wouldn't get smashed by a wolf, a dull thud was heard as it hit the grass. I pulled the sword out of the ground and grabbed a dagger that sat on my hip. The three wolves that were still alive were approaching fast.

"Sonja, run." My voice was low, but I knew it was loud enough that she heard, I didn't dare to take my eyes off the wolves to see if she'd listened. The sound of Sonja's hooves pounded on the ground as she left, a confirmation that she'd listened to me. A wolf went to go after her, but the dagger in my hand went flying and logged itself into its neck before it made it anywhere close to where she'd left.

I palmed another as the two wolves lunged at me. I moved like liquid as I start to cut them down, I wasn't able to kill either without focusing on only one, so I made any cut I could to slow them down. One of the two had got too close for comfort and it was then when I royally fucked up.

I dug my dagger into the wolf’s neck and dragged it down, its blood spraying out on me as I made a large cut into its neck, killing it. Before I could bring my attention back to the other wolf, its claws sunk into the left side of my waist, I let out a scream of pain as it happened.

I was able to turn away fast enough before its claws got too deep. The turn caused me to fall, stared the wolf in the eyes as it happened, and before I hit the ground I dug into the chaos around me and flung a blast of magic towards the wolf, sending it flying into a tree. Two loud cracks were heard, one from the tree falling and the other from the wolfs back breaking. 

The cracks where the last thing I heard after I fell and blacked out due to the pain.

— ‡ —

"I can't believe you got us kicked out of town." Jaskier huffed as he walked next to Geralt and Roach through the forest.

Geralt grunted in response and not long after wolf howls were heard close by, Geralt stopped walking, Roach and Jaskier following his movements.

The bard's eyes widened, "Is that the pack of wolves you were hired to kill?" Jaskier's tongue felt like lead as the words fell from his mouth.

Geralt was already preparing to go on a hunt by digging through a bag of potions looking for the Wolf potion and downed when he found it.

"Stay here." Geralt commanded as he started walking towards the howls.

Before he could take more than a couple of steps, Sonja burst through the trees and is blocking Geralt's path. It didn't take Geralt long to recognize the black Andalusian horse from earlier. The horse's rider was nowhere to be seen but from its frantic state, Geralt guessed whatever happened to the woman from earlier wasn't good.

"Geralt-" Jaskier was cut off by a scream, a blast of magic, and a tree falling. The bard and Witcher shared a look, both wondering what the hell was going on.

Sonja had other plans and bit down on a piece of Geralt's armor, tugging at it trying to get the Witcher to its rider. 

Roach growled at Sonja not taking a liking to the horse biting at her rider. 

Geralt was about to push the strange horse off him when he got a feeling that he should listen to the horse. Sonja tugged at him again, he let out a sigh and pushed the horse away from him. 

"Stay here." Geralt said to Jaskier once again and started towards the direction the horse had come from, she started to lead the Witcher to her owner.

When Geralt and Sonja reached the clearing, the grass was dead unlike the plants throughout the rest of the forest, which were very much alive. Towards the center of the clearing, blood soaked the dead grass, the woman from earlier was laying in the middle of it all, two wolf bodies laid not too far away from hers, three others laid on the opposite side of the clearing from Geralt, and off to the side laid another, it had gone through a tree - the tree he heard fall.

The Witcher cursed under his breath as he started to piece together what had happened. Sonja was already at her owners’ side when Geralt started walking towards the unconscious woman, if it wasn't for her low heartbeat, he would've thought her dead. 

He was standing by her side when he took in the damage, four claw marks were at the side of her waist, deep enough that they would've killed a normal human by this point, but he concluded from her pointed ears that her elven heritage was keeping her alive at the moment.

Geralt yelled for the bard and his horse.

What the hell had happened here?

— ‡ —

A crackling fire and a singing bard woke me from what felt like death. I probably would've thought that I was dead if it weren't for the sharp pain coming from my side. I stayed still and my eyes closed, pretending to still be asleep. All of my weapons had been taken from me, whoever was close by was smart to do that but not smart enough, because I wasn't tied up.

"I know you're awake." A brusque voice spoke nearby, he was closer to me than the bard who had stopped singing. My eyes snapped open, the night sky greeted me, I set up so I could take in my surroundings. The movement irritated my wound and I bite my tongue to hold in the hiss of pain. My eyes met amber eyes of the Witcher that I'd seen in the town I was going board at. He was sitting to face me, he back to the fire, and all of my blade were laid out on the ground before his feet, the sword, bow, and arrows were propped up beside him on the log he sat on. I held his gaze until I seen movement out of the corner of my eye, my head snapped towards it to find the bard lowering his lute to the ground. My eyes narrowed as I took in his frightened stature, he swallowed and scooted down the log he sat on to get further away from. Behind him were Sonja and another horse, both eating on something that I couldn't see. Blood still soaked the ground, but the wolf bodies had been removed - I was still in the same clearing as before. I also knew I was still covered in blood; I could feel it died on my skin - I needed a bath.

The Witcher growled and my head slowly turned back towards him, after staring down at each other for another couple of moments I raised an eyebrow at him. "So, are you going to kill me?"

"I was the one to wrap you." The words where low as if he was debating on killing me instead.

"And disarm me too I bet, seeing as your bard is too scared to get any closer to me." Another growl came from his throat, I smirked. He was protective of the bard. "You still didn't answer my question."

"I kill monsters, not people assassin." The bard gasped behind the Witcher and I smelled another wave of fear from the bard. The Witcher had seen Ramerd's mark on me.

I let out a low chuckle, "Most people would consider me one."

The Witcher didn't say anything back but a low hum. I let out a breath and look down to my stomach to see a tight bandage wrapped around my stomach peeking through my torn shirt. "You wouldn't have been what would've killed me, you could've left me."

The was no response and then, "Your horse was pretty adamant about me saving you."

My head snapped up at that, but not towards the Witcher but towards Sonja. She was looking right at me, I narrowed my eyes at her, and let out a puff of air and shook her like as if she was saying you really thought I was going to let you die that easy?

I turn back towards the Witcher, "How long?"

"A couple hours."

I nodded, closed my eyes, and let out a breath, Ramerd wasn't going to kill me. Ramerd Gamward was a very punctual man and he did not like waiting. He knew how long it took to get around the continent and even being one day late was pushing it and you'd better have a damn near good excuse for it.

"So, what are you going to do to me then?" I finally asked.

"As long as you don't try anything, you're free to do whatever." The bard jumped up at his words.

"You're just going to let her be free? She's an assassin Geralt! She kills people for a living in case you've forgotten!" The Witcher had turned towards the bard that had suddenly gained bravery.

"Have you killed anyone bard?" He lost his bravado and his mouth opening and closing due to my attention being directly on him. The Witcher's attention was back on me.

"No... No, I have not." 

"Then I have no reason to kill you." I state as I slowly got up, I was surprised when the Witcher didn't get up to follow me. I slowly walked towards the closest tree, I kept my head up and bit down on my tongue hating the pain I was in and the fact that I was so slow in front of two men I didn't know.

"Where are you going?" The bard asked, the Witcher must've made him brave. 

I ignored the bard and disappeared into the trees where they couldn't see me, but I knew the Witcher was still aware of every moment I made, he would be until I'd packed up and left.

I took off my torn shirt, unwrapped my wound, and slumped up against a tree, leaning my forehead on its rough bark, I took a few breaths, and started drawing power from the tree to heal the claw marks. The bard was talking but I couldn't make out his words due to focusing on healing myself. I stayed like this until the claw marks were nothing but little red lines. I pulled away from the tree and let out a quiet gasp as my senses came back to me just in time to hear the Witcher say, "Her master is Ramerd Gamward, she's not going to harm you."

They were talking about me, which wasn't no surprise, I'm sure the bard decided that my absence was a good time to give the Witcher an earful.

"And that's supposed to make things better?"

I collected myself and headed back toward the clearing, I made sure to make noise while walking back so I didn't give the bard a heart attack, although I would find it funny, I'm sure the Witcher wouldn't be too happy about it.

I didn't say a word to the two when I made my appearance again and keep my face neutral as if I didn't hear them talking. The bard’s eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his skull when he seen that nothing but the wrap around my breast were covering my upper half. I walked straight towards my packs that were left where I left them and not too far from Sonja and the other horse. I sat down next to my bags, my back to the duo, and I grab one of my water skins and a cloth. I wet the cloth and start rubbing my face with it, once I'm satisfied, I rinse and wet it again and start working on getting the blood off the rest of my body.

Once I'm satisfied, I dig out a clean tunic and slipped it on. I grabbed the dirty a cloth and another along with the water skin, I stood up, walked towards the Witcher who was now facing the fire and I sat down next to him but with my back facing the fire, grab a bloodied dagger and started wiping it down.

The Witcher’s head turned to look at me and watched as I started cleaning my weapons.

"My name's Y/N."

He gave a low hum. "Geralt."

— ‡ —


	2. Holy Water Cannot Help You Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y/N runs into Geralt once again, but this time in Guleta and the night ends differently than the night in the forest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Geralt x assassin!reader / Geralt x half-elf!reader
> 
> Word Count: 4449
> 
> Warnings: Smut (18+)
> 
> Song: Seven Devils - Florence & the Machine / Worst Behavior - ALMA, Tove Lo

The night that I'd met Geralt and the bard Jaskier was a strange one. I'd refused to let them run me off from camp. Yes, they'd saved my life, but I had still sat up camp there before them, and Geralt had agreed. It was that decision that caused Jaskier's face to turn so red it had almost looked like it was going to start steaming. I'd also learned that the wolf pack I'd killed was what Geralt was hired to hunt and kill, I'd told the witcher that I wasn't going to claim the money, that instead he could.

It was before dawn when I started preparing to leave. Geralt had woken up when I'd started packing, first it was silent between the two of us, him just watching me, until he decided to finally speak.

"You could've easily killed all of those wolves with chaos." I knew that his statement had a hidden question behind it, 'why didn't you'?

"I was itching for a fight." I hooked some of my bags onto Sonja's saddle. Wanting to fight was only half of the truth and the witcher knew it. When I turned around to face him again, he was leaning up against a tree, arms crossed in front of his chest, and an eyebrow raised as if saying 'that's a fucking lie'.

"You have no idea on what it's like living under Ramerd Gamward's thumb." I grabbed the last of my bags, the zhefar and arrows, and hooked them to the saddle. I climbed onto Sonja, ready to leave but I paused before I did and turned to the witcher.

"Thank you for saving me."

Geralt grunted in response, but there was something that seemed to glow in his amber eyes. I couldn't put my finger on it but when I reached the road, I knew some type of bond was formed between the two of us that left me wishing to see the witcher again.

It had been four months since I'd met the duo. I hated were I was currently staying, I hated being this close to Vengerberg.

Even though it got drilled into my head at a young age by Ramerd Gamward — who ironically was an elf himself — that neither elves nor humans would want me, I'd pick the elves over humans any day. I understood elves distrust and distaste for humans. It was a human that killed my mother. It was humans that slaughtered hundreds and hundreds of elves.

Even though it was Guleta, it was still too close to Vengerberg, it made my skin crawl and body kick into high alert mode. While I normally did this, I made sure there was no removing my cloak or its hood while I was here, but unlike normal I made sure no one could even see my face. I made sure that I was nothing but a shadow because if one of these humans found out I had elf blood in me, they'd want my head. My identity wasn't the only thing the cloak was covering, it was also hiding the elven bow and arrows, eleven sword, and multiple blades that were strapped to my body.

I found an inn in the outskirts of Guleta, it was shitty but necessary because no one would question whether or not they should let me stay. I tied Sonja to a hitching rail, already smelling the stale ale from inside, I grabbed a bag of ducat coins, and walked in. The smell hit me in the face when I walked in, but I held my composer. The inn was filled with drunken men and some wenches were spotted in some of those men's laps, the floor was sticky with spilled ale, I fought to not make a face in disgust. I walked up to the bar and asked for an innkeeper and it wasn't long after a round man with a face redder than his hair came up to me - he drank too much.

"What do you want?" He placed a large hand on the bar, leaning into it.

"I need a room for two nights and no one bothering me." I toss two golden ducats onto the counter; it was more than enough but I was in no mood to haggle with the man. The coins were gone the moment they hit the counter and a key in its place.

"Upstairs, second to the last room on the right." I grabbed the key and turned to leave when I heard a certain bard singing. I turned my head to his direction and find Jaskier drunkenly singing one of his stories about the white haired Witcher he followed around.

I turned back to the doors and walk out to see if the stable across the street would keep Sonja. I untie her and lead her over to the stables, stable boy sat outside of it playing cards by himself.

"How can I help you?" The boy asked looking up from his game when I stopped in front of him. The boy was nothing but skin and bones.

"Is there a stall available?"

"Yes, a silver ducat for a night."

"I need one for two nights," I hand him two golden coins. "Keep the rest for yourself."

His eyes widen in shock, "Thank- Thank you. Right this way." He got up and lead me to the stalls and stopped at an empty one towards the middle. "Is this one good?"

"Yes."

"I'll leave you to it then." He walked back outside, leaving me alone. I lead Sonja into the stable and started taking my bag, her saddle, and lead off. I pick up my bag once I got everything off her and dug into the bag for an apple. Once I find it, I hold it out for her, and she took it from my hand. Before she leaned down to eat, I stopped her and held her head up, so she'd look me into the eye.

"Behave."

She responded by giving me a huff of air, I shook my head and patted hers. I slung my bag onto my shoulder and left, making sure the gate was latched when I shut it. I looked up into the stall across from Sonja's to find the witcher's mare occupying it. Great.

I walk back into the inn and this time I spotted a head of white hair sitting in a dark, back corner while the bard sang one of his tones nearby. I quickly went up the stairs and found my room, I unlocked the door, and wasn't surprised to find nothing but a poor excuse for a bed that sat in the middle of the room and a little desk was off to the side.

I sat my bag on the desk and untied my cloak. I threw it on the desk and unstrapped my bow and arrows, I sat both on the side of the bed, I laid down on the floor, held my breath, and scooted underneath it. I made quick on strapping the bow towards the edge of the head of the frame, arrows right beside the bow, and got out and up once I felt like they weren't going to fall. I frowned as I dust my back off. I grabbed my cloak and slipped it on, sinking back into the shadows yet again. I picked up my keys, slipped them into my pants pocket, and left the room, locking the door as I walked out.

I wasn't thinking much as I walked and before I knew it, I was downstairs and headed towards the witcher. I didn't know why I was making my way through the inn towards him, but something was telling — pulling — me to go to him, then before I knew it, I was in front of his table.

"I don't want any company." He didn't look up from his mug of ale.

"I'd thought you'd have more of a finer taste in ale, not this stale shit." I leaned up against a support beam that'd connected itself to the bench opposite of Geralt. A smirk formed on my lips when his head shot up at my remark. I knew he could see my face hidden in the shadows of the hood with his catlike eyesight.

"Y/N." He breathed my name out with ease, a smirk played on his lips too at the sight of me. The bond that I had felt four months was back and pulling hard towards the witcher.

"May I?" I tilt my head down to the bench. One of his hands that were wrapped around his mug gestured for me to sit. I slide onto the bench with feline grace and placed both of my arms on the table, clasp my gloved fingers together, and leaned into them. We stared at each other like this for a bit both of us still keeping the smirk on our lips, his eyes almost seemed like they were sparkling as he stared me down.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, finally breaking the spell that we seemed to be in.

"What do you think?" I lean back against the back of the bench, hands still clasped on top of the table, enjoying whatever game it was that we were playing. He hummed in response. "What about you?"

"What do you think?" He shot my response to his same question back at me; this was definitely a game. I let out a low chuckle, a genuine smile gracing my lips and from the looks of it, his too. "How long?"

"A couple of days." I look down as I unclasp my hands and flatten them out on the table, I could almost feel the sexual tension between us on my skin. I fluttered my eyes a bit and looked up to meet his own again. "Why, did you miss me?"

He hummed again. "Just curious."

"Is that so?" I drummed my fingers against the table once. "Wh-"

"Who's this?" Jaskier interrupted me and stood at the edge of the table with his hands on his hips. I tilt my head back just the slightest so Jaskier could see my face, I gave the bard a shit-eating grin.

"Hello Jaskier." I purred out the words to fuck with the bard.

"Oh no, no, no, no. I don't know what's going on here, but no." He shook his finger in my face, I made a biting motion, he quickly pulled his hand back and held it to his chest, I laughed at his reaction. He turned to Geralt, "You must have you lost your damn mind? She's the devil incarnate."

There was a mischievous glint in Geralt's eyes, he just stared at the bard.

"You can't be serious?" The bard gasped.

"Well," I cut in and stood up, standing close to Jaskier, he took a step away. "It was nice seeing you two, but I've got to go." I fix my hood so the average human couldn't see nothing but shadow. "Goodnight Jaskier. Geralt." I flicker my eyes to the witcher, letting him see the playful look in my eyes.

I stepped away from the two and started for the stairs, I swayed my hips as I walked towards my room even though they were covered by the cloak, it swayed with my hips. I felt the witcher's eyes burning into my back, so I turn my head enough for the hood to move with it as if I was looking back at him.

I had gotten to my door and unlocked it when I felt the witcher's presence at the end of the hall. I turned my head to face him to find him swiftly moving down the hall, his eyes pinpointed on me. Once he reached me, I let him push me up against the door, his bright amber eyes were dark with lust, we were so close to each other our breaths were mingling together.

"What are you going to do to me?" I asked, my words dripped with lust. I laid my hands on top of his chest and brought my face closer to his, our lips inches apart, I flickered my eyes to his lips and back to his eyes.

He didn't say anything but placed his hand to the back of my neck, pulling me closer. So close that my lips were brushing against his. I finally kiss him, not being able to handle the proximity that our lips were at. He let out a low growl, deepened the kiss, and pushed me into the door, his knee pushing its way in between my legs, pinning me to the door.

I blindly reached for the doorknob and once I found it, I twisted it open. We both stumbled into the room but fought to keep our lips connected, he kicked the door closed once we got far enough in. I finally broke the kiss for air but he continued kissing me but down my neck as I gasped down air, one hand tugging at the tie that held my cloak in place and the other was gripping the ends of my hair and pulling my neck back so he could have better access to my neck. After I got enough air in my lungs and my cloak pooled at our feet, I turned us around and pushed him onto the bed. My eyes didn't leave Geralt's as I took my jacket and weapons belt off and let them fall to the floor. I moved to straddle his lap and he wasted no time to connect our lips once again. In the midst of our kiss, I started unbuttoning his shirt. When I got his shirt off, my hands started to roam around his chest and arms, his did the same to me but also pushing my shirt up in the process. I broke the kiss to let him take my shirt off. He's hands pushed down on my hips grinding me down on him, I bit my lip to hold in the moan.

"Stop biting your lip." His voice smokey as his thumb dragged my lip out from underneath my teeth. I held eye contact with him as I took his thumb into my mouth and sucked. I released his thumb after I was satisfied when I felt him get harder underneath me.

I rolled my hips down on him as I leaned in, brushing my lips on the shell of his ear, "Fuck me."

As if a switch flipped in him, a growl rumbled through his body and then he flipped me over, he nipped at my collar bone and undid the wrap around my breast. They met air but it did not take long for him to take a nipple into his mouth, he sucked on it a little and then moved to the other. The blast of cold air on it in contrast to his warm mouth caused me to moan, I could feel a smirk forming on his lips against my skin.

He moved away from my beast and grazed his teeth against my neck. "I'm going to ruin you."

His naturally low voice got darker with lust, another wave of pleasure pooled down at my heat. I gripped his hair, one hand pulling at the tie that held his hair back and the other pulling his head back so I could look him in the eyes. "Do it then."

"With pleasure." His smile was filled with sin, he moved down my body, his hair slipped through my fingers. His nose and lips danced across the skin of my abdomen. His fingers danced as he undid the laces on my pants, he started tugging at the waist and I lifted my hips up so he could pull them off. A loud thunk was heard when my pants, undergarments, and boots hit the floor due to the multiple knives there were strapped to or hidden within the clothes. He raised an eyebrow as if he was saying 'really', I smiled in return and sat up. I looked up at him as my fingers fumbled with the laces on his own pants and placed a kiss on his abdomen while still holding eye contact. When I got the laces untied, he pushed me back into the bed, and was already on top of me before I could sit back up to watch him strip. He grunted, fire in his eyes as he said, "I'm ruining you, not the other way around."

His lips brushed my legs with feather like softness. My back arched off the bed with his feather like touches and he took that as his opportunity to slide an arm underneath my back and he placed his other on my hips, holding me down. He bit the inside of my thigh, so close to my heat that I let out a quiet whimper, his glowing amber eyes flickered up to me and held my gaze as he licked a stripe up between my folds, a moan slipped from my lips. "You're so wet." He tutted and pressed a finger at my entrance as his tongue circled around my clit, my fingers gripped the sheets, it had been way too fucking long since I felt this kind of pleasure. Without a warning, he pushed his finger in me, so painfully slow, I bucked my hips up to try to get him to go deeper, but the arm that was behind my back was quick to move at pushing my hips back down. His tongue pressed down on my clit and he added a second figure, stretching me out while his fingers fucked me. I couldn't help the whine that I let out as I pushed my head into the pillows and squeezed my eyes shut, I needed to be fucked now. 

"Geralt," I panted as his fingers sped up and I gripped his hair. "I need you now."

He pulled away from my heat, crawling his way up my body oh so slowly. He continued his torture by brushing his lips across my own. "Is that so?"

"Yes," The word was barely a whisper, but by the way his amber eyes flared, I knew he heard it. In a blink of an eye, his lips connected with my own. I could taste myself on his tongue and by the time I was fully detracted with his lips, he slowly sunk himself into me, causing me to gasp for air and him to groan. I sink my nails into his shoulders looking for a release due to the bliss. Once he was balls deep, he pulled out and slammed back into me again.

"Fuck, you're so tight." He grunted, burying his head in the crook of my neck and bit my skin as his hips fell into a steady pace and my legs wrapped around his waist. The pain from his bites and pleasure from his dick filling me and pounding into me was so overwhelming it was hard to think; all I could seem to do as he attacked my seizing body was moan and claw at his back. I could feel him as he pushed against the knot that was slowly forming in my stomach, every stroke brought me closer and closer to the edge.

"Ger... Geralt," His named was broken up by moans, I clung to his body.

"I know, wait." He grumbled into my skin, his forehead pressed into my shoulder, I tangled a hand into his hair. His pounding sped up and a hand slipped down between our bodies, one of his fingers pressed down on the swollen bud of my clit and made hard circles, I clenched around him as another wave of pleasure crashed down upon me. "Now."

The demand was all it took to send me over the edge, I screamed out in pleasure. He watched as I fell apart underneath him, my walls clenched and unclenched around him causing him to growl and bring him to his own release. My walls milked the witcher as ropes of his hot come shot deep inside me.

He fell on top of me after he finished and groaned in my ear, "Fuck." 

Our chest pushed against each other as we came down from our highs, I closed my eyes and pushed my head down into the pillows, basking in the afterglow. After we both caught our breath, Geralt rolled over, pulling out of me as he did. I exhaled at the feeling of being empty of him and my body feeling heavy from the ecstasy I had just experienced.

A moment and then Geralt turned to face me, propping his head up on his arm so he could look down at me, he brushed a piece of hair away from my face. His chest was shining with sweat and I knew I wasn't any better, I was still taking deep breaths as I looked into his golden eyes which sparked with mischief. 

A smirk ghosted his lips, "You know, not all of us are spoiled assassins that get the luxury of drinking expensive ale."

"What?" I laughed. He grabbed my hand, his thumb messaging my palm, a smirk played on his lips.

"My taste in ale."

"Ah," I laughed yet again, my heart felt like it was blooming with joy, something I hadn't felt in years. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face and while it felt strange, I didn't want it to leave. "You should feel honored."

He raised an eyebrow, now smiling. "Oh really, why's that?"

"Because I haven't smiled and laughed like this in a hundred years."

A chuckle rumbled through his chest; his hand now cupped my face. We laid like this in silence for a bit, just starring at each other, enjoying the rare moment of happiness we shared. It was then that I decided I had to protect this happiness and despite wanting to stay in this sunshine like feeling forever, I knew I had to change the mood between us in order to keep this same ray of light I found protected.

"Whatever it is you're doing here; I'd get out of town in two days." I say in the silence, hating that I took away the light and airy feeling around us.

He grunted and sat up and started moving to the edge of the bed, his back to me. I closed my eyes and took a breath trying to calm the empty feeling spreading back into my heart.

"I'm serious." I spoke so softly that Geralt wouldn't have heard the words if it wasn't for his enhanced hearing. "My target is going to cause the city to go into high alert and they'd think you to be the murderer." His body whipped around, his eyes burning into mine, his eyes squinting into a glare.

"Who?" It was more of a command than a question. I move to get out of bed, but his hand clamped down on my wrist.

"I can't t-"

"Who?" He cut me off, his voice darker with the demand.

"The Duke of Eysenlaan." I whispered low enough that only Geralt would hear, I didn't need any wondering ears hearing who it was. 

He clenched his jaw, "Why?"

"I don't know." I looked away from him and towards the ceiling trying to blink away the tears. I hated not only the tears and the way my voice cracked at those words but also because Gamward shut me out on this one. He'd always given me a reason as to why I was killing someone, it gave me a peace of mind knowing that it was evil I was killing and not someone good, he'd known this. Not knowing why I was killing the Duke for tore at my insides, for the first time not trusting Ramerd’s intentions on this kill.

Geralt's hold on my wrist loosed and disappeared altogether, the silence killed me. I was terrified to look into his eyes. I felt the bed shift, but I didn't dare to look towards him, not wanting to see him leave. I let out a gasp as he started to pull my body towards him and wrapped his arms around me, my eyes widen in shock, this was the very last thing I'd expected him to do.

"What did he tell you would happen if you didn't follow his orders?" I felt his chest rumble along with his voice against my skin, I turned away from him. 

"You don't want to know." 

"Tell me anyways." I took a breath and told him everything, the amount of torture and pain that Ramerd had promised if I didn't do as he said, tears slipped down my cheeks. Geralt's arm tighten around me when my voice cracked from telling him the horrifying details. I could feel the anger rolling off him once I finished telling him.

After my confession, my body and mind were tired. And I was tired. So tired of this life. But for some odd reason, Geralt's arms around me brought a comfort to me that I didn't know I needed until now. 

— ‡ —

When Geralt had first seen the assassin that night, he couldn't explain the pull his heart felt towards her, almost as if something had bound the two together, the bond hadn't stopped pulling at his heart until he had pulled her up against her door; his head pounded with thoughts of fucking her, as if he was under a spell. And now, all Geralt could think about as the assassin slept in his arms was four months ago when she'd uttered the words, 'you have no idea on what it's like living under Ramerd Gamward's thumb.' 

She was right, he had no idea. He knew he had no idea when she'd said those words, but the reality of those words didn't hit him until she'd confessed the promise of torture her master gave her if she didn't complete his request. 

'Her master.' Those words burned him with anger. It made him want to squeeze the life out of the man that had not only taken the life from others, but the life from the girl that lay in his arms.

The witcher knew when her voice broke while telling him she didn’t know why Gamward wanted her to kill the Duke, this normally didn’t happen to her, and that it tore at her not knowing the reason she was about to kill someone.

So once Geralt finally feel asleep, a smile found itself on his face as he dreamed about taking Ramerd Gamward's life and freeing Y/N from the bastard.

— ‡ —

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a part three


	3. ‘Cause They Took Your Loved Ones

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Geralt x assassin!reader / Geralt x half-elf!reader
> 
> Word Count: 3549
> 
> Warnings: Somewhat graphic depictions of violence
> 
> Song: What the Water Gave Me - Florence & the Machine

It was the night I was going to raise hell in Guleta, I spent the entirety of yesterday and today spying on the Duke of Eysenlaan. Ramerd never gave me a reason to assassinate the man, but I knew as soon as he told me that if I didn’t do it, he’d make my torture painfully slow, so painful that I’d be begging him to kill me. I knew it wasn’t a threat, but a promise. I knew what he was capable of, I was even taught some of the things he’d threaten to do to me, and I wasn’t about to ask any questions on what the Duke did to piss of Ramerd.

It still nagged at me, not knowing why I was killing this man. But I tried my hardest to sink into my training, to go into that killing calm that had been instilled into me, because I knew when the time came and I was still thinking about my doubts, I wouldn’t be able to kill the Duke.

Geralt had left town this morning with Jaskier, Roach, and Sonja, but that wasn’t without him telling me that if I hadn’t met up with him before dawn, he’d come after me. I had spent my morning making sure that the four of them were safe. I’d also spent it mapping out multiple escape routes in case someone had seen me or noticed that the Duke was murdered before I could get out.

This mission was dangerous, more so than any other I’d been on. Geralt knew it was dangerous too, he didn’t want me to do it alone, but he also understood that this was something I needed to do alone.

It was a new moon tonight, something that I had been thankful for because otherwise it would’ve made this kill so much harder. I stood on a roof across an alley from the house the Duke was staying at. The moon made it so much easier to blend into the chimney’s shadows as I knocked an arrow into my bow and pulled it taught, aiming it towards the sleeping Duke who had mistakenly left his window open. I inhaled and held it gathering all of my thoughts and let go of the arrow as I exhaled all of them out. It found its mark in his neck and I wasted no time turning to start running and jumping across roofs to get away from the house he was staying at, my feet barely touched the ground as I ran and jumped as fast as I possibly could from roof to roof, the elven speed I carried in my blood made my movements swift, nothing but a shadow. When I finally gotten to the house I marked to get to the street, I put my bow in its place and jumped over the side of the house, sliding down a drainpipe, my feet swiftly hitting the ground. It took me a minute and a half to run across the roofs.

I moved in the shadows of back alleyways, my heart pounding as I waited for the alarm bells to ring, alerting the town of a murder. By the time I reached the outskirts of Guleta, no alarm bells had yet to ring, I knew then that I was just bidding my time. So I broke into a sprint across the land separating Guleta from the forest, my footsteps feel to deaf ears as I counted down the minutes, I had given myself fifteen minutes, a time that I knew was pushing it, but that time was what I’d given myself before letting fear seep into my veins.

I’d broken the tree line when my mental clock passed twelve minutes, it was then that I decided I wouldn’t stop running until I reached Geralt.

The rapid beat of my heart filled my ears as I jumped over tree roots and moved around trees, I used the pounding as a tempo for my feet, pacing myself in my haste.

Fifteen minutes had past, and panic started to settle in, and tears started to come to my eyes, but I did not let my speed falter.

The moment it got harder for me to breathe was when I reached the clearing Geralt and I agreed to meet at, relief was the first thing I’d seen in his amber eyes as I ran to him, then it was worry when he seen the state I was in. I’d slowed my steps but not enough when I reached him, it caused me to slam into his chest, but he caught me anyways, keeping himself steady when I crashed into himself.

His arms wrapped themselves around, holding me to his body. My cheek was pressed against his chest as I took deep breaths to calm down, I was safe.

He didn’t say a word as I pulled myself together, something I was grateful for, because explaining the feelings I just had would’ve brought me back into a panic. The second I had fully caught my breath, warning bells sounded, my body stilled.

“We’ve got to go.” Geralt said, his chest rumbling under my cheek, I still didn’t move.

Why did Ramerd have me kill the man?

Geralt grunted and picked me up, lifting my legs around his waist. He turned and started to head towards where he’d left Jaskier and our horses, but all I could do was stare towards Guleta.

What have I done?

— ‡ —

I had managed to calm myself down for the most part, but I still held onto Geralt as he carried me, he didn’t seem to mind so I didn’t either.

I could hear Jaskier’s singing before I heard the horse’s heartbeats, I knew it was the same for Geralt. He grunted and then sat me down to my feet, his amber eyes boring into my own. His hand cupped my cheek, thumb running across the skin, then the bard had gotten out his lute, Geralt’s hand fell from my face and he groaned.

“Fucking bard.” I cracked a smile, something that had seemed to satisfy him as he started moving towards the bard.

I stayed in that spot for a moment, only long enough to wipe the tears from my face and pull that confident assassin out from the shadows of my soul.

I squared my shoulders and held my head up high and headed towards the bard who had just been told to stop his singing by the witcher.

Once I stepped into the space they were at, both men’s eyes snapped to me, Jaskier wondering what my next moves were and Geralt wondering if I was okay.

I smiled and head over towards Sonja, lightly brushing my hand down her snout, looking into her black eyes. I turned my head to look over my shoulder at the two. “Are you boys ready to go? We’ve got to put some distance between us and Guleta.”

“We’re traveling in the forest at night?” Jaskier’s eyes widened, uncertainty coating his voice. Geralt grunted and I gave the bard a smirk after I climbed onto Sonja.

“We’ll protect you, don’t worry.” I sent a wink towards him as Geralt got up on Roach.

“So, we’re running because of you and I don’t even get a horse.” Geralt raised an eyebrow at Jaskier’s complaint but I planted a wicked smile on my face — the kind that normally made men run — and bated my eyelashes.

“You could join me and Sonja.”

“Oh no, you’re the devil and she’s your demonic beast.” A chuckle slipped from my lips as Sonja snorted and shook her head, stomping her hooves a bit at Jaskier’s words.

“Get on.” Geralt grunted, his face saying that he was tired of Jaskier’s antics, but the sparkle in his eyes saying that he enjoyed watching me toy with him.

“You can’t be serious.” Jaskier was gasping at Geralt, as if he’d just handed him over to the actual devil — which in Jaskier’s case, I was. I moved Sonja over to stand by the bard, he turned back to me, I looked down at him over my shoulder, that smile still on my lips.

“I’ll play nice, I promise.” He opened his mouth to say something but Geralt cut him off.

“We will leave you if you don’t get on.”

Jaskier gulped and slowly climbed on behind me, once he finally got himself settled, I peeked behind my shoulder at him. “You’ll want to hang on.”

He looked like he was about to shit his pants as he slowly wrapped his arms around my waist. I met Geralt’s eyes as if asking him if he was ready. He angled his head towards the direction we were headed, eyebrows raised as if to say, 'lead the way.’

That was all the conformation I needed so leaned down to Sonja’s ear and whispered, “Give 'em hell.”

That was all she needed, once I sat up, she shot off, flying over the fallen tree limbs and roots, Jaskier’s arms tightening around my waist. When I felt Geralt’s presence behind us, I let myself go, closing my eyes and leaning back, enjoying as the cold air bit into my cheeks.

This was what I needed.

— ‡ —

It had been a year since I came across Geralt in that Guleta inn, a year of running into him multiple more times during my travels, it was almost as if destiny wanted us together. I’d never learned exactly why I killed the Duke, only that I was sent because I was the only one that Ramerd trusted to do something like, the only one capable of killing a high profile man and being able to walk away from it. If I’d known why I killed the Duke and that it was for good reason, I would’ve let myself feel pride in knowing that Ramerd considered me the best, a praise that I’d been searching for from him since I was six years old. But now, finally receiving that praise, it made me feel dirty.

I’d just gotten back from a mission in Sarda, so naturally I headed straight towards Ramerd’s office, and it didn’t take him but a moment to smell Geralt on me - who I had met on my way back to the Keep.

Ramerd Gamward was a beautiful man due to being an elf, his hair was a dark coppery brown — almost like blood — he had sharp and defined facial features like any other elf, and his eyes were an icy blue, just as cold too. So when he narrowed his icy eyes at me, it took everything in me to not shiver.

“It was one thing when I smelt that man on you the first time, now it’s been multiple more times since then.” It was the first words he’d spoken to me since my arrival. He got up from his desk chair and walked around it, coming straight towards me and didn’t stop until he had me backed up against a wall. “I don’t like sharing what’s mine.” My face and body were stoic as he whispered the next words in my ear. “I wouldn’t want to do to him what I had done to your last lover, Taileth.”

I sucked in a breath at the mention of his name, the memory of finding his bloody body. Taileth was an elven warrior, who hadn’t given a single shit that I was an halfling or an assassin, he loved me for who I was. He’d given me the zefhar and sword I carried with me, things that Ramerd thought I’d bought with my own coin, things that I’d kill to protect.

Ramerd let out a low chuckle, knowing he had struck a chord with the mention of Taileth’s name. He moved back far enough to look me in the eyes, pure evil shone in his ice like eyes. He raised a hand to my cheek, brushing a loose piece of hair behind my ear, I stilled myself in order to not move away from his touch. “With that reminder, I’ll forgive your mistakes, but don’t make them again.”

'My mistakes.’ Rage spread throughout my body and roared in my ears, but I bit it back down.

He took a step back, satisfied with the damage he caused me. “You may go now.”

I didn’t waste a second walking out of his office, my nails biting into my palm to reel in the anger. By the time I had gotten out of his office and down the hallway, blood was dripping from my hands. It was only when I got to my room on the opposite side of the castle did I open my fist up.

It wasn’t long before I had some small ornament in my head and was chucking it across my room, a scream releasing itself from my lips as the glass figure shattered against the opposing wall.

I had to get out of here. I knew that I did the moment all I could see was red.

I stormed out of my room, not caring about the mess I left behind as I made my way to the castle stables, the Keep was suffocating me, images of Taileth’s broken body. Blood was rushing in my ears, the need to kill every living thing in the castle, the need caused me to hope that no one crossed my path because I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from cutting someone down.

I yanked the door that lead to the stables and broke into a run towards them. It didn’t take me but a minute to reach Sonja’s stall. I didn’t bother with any saddles or reins and got on her bareback, by the time I was settled, my hands wrapped in her mane, she hurried out of the stalls and toward to forest, as if she knew exactly what I needed.

The cold winds rushing through my body slowly cooled the anger but was never enough. Sonja knew exactly where to go seeing as this wasn’t the first time something like this had happened.

Sonja slowed down as we approached the lake — our spot. Ramerd’s castle was hidden in between a forest and the Blue Mountains in Kaedwen. And a small river from the Mountains ran into the lake, runoff from the melting snow.

I slid off Sonja and started stripping, wasting no time in immersing myself into the cold water. By the time everything but my head was underwater, the blinding anger had washed away, all that was felt was emptiness. I turned my body towards the Keep, backing further into the water, and when the water passed my nose, I paused remembering the love Taileth gave me, the sunshine I’d lost from his death and gained back with Geralt. I was going to protect the light, no matter how dark I had to get to protect it. This was war and for once I was going to win it.

With those last thoughts, I let the water take me, along with the painful memories of the past as I submerged the rest of my head into the water.

— ‡ —

By the time I made it back to the Keep, dinner was about to start, and I headed that way, knowing that if I wasn’t in attendance, it wasn’t going to end well for me. I stopped before the dining hall doors, closed my eyes and took in a deep breath, I exhaled and opened my eyes, settling back into the obedient pet that I played for Ramerd. I swung the doors open and stepped into the lion’s den.

“I almost thought you wouldn’t have joined us tonight.” Ramerd’s voice breaks through the mingling that was going on between the hall. He sat at the head of the table, a smile on his face as his hand gestured to the empty seat to his right - my seat.

“I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” The words tasted bitter on my tongue, but I powered through the words and the smile on my face. I was so disgusted with myself for playing his game, but I sunk into the feeling because I was playing the monster he made me to be, and he knew it.

I held my head up high and slid into the chair next to him, the hall had resumed it chatter.

I looked around the table seven out of the twenty assassins under Ramerd’s belt were here, not counting myself. Most of the assassins that Ramerd trained had some form of elf blood in them, he said that our enhanced senses gave us an edge that human didn’t have, plus our slow aging made us a better investment for him. He also always failed to mention that halflings and quarter-elves were easy to get whether it was through people selling their children off to him to pay off some debt or like myself, orphans. Like he always said, no one wanted us, no one but him so he could paint himself as a God to us.

Yrnar sat across from me, he was Ramerd’s second, had been since Ramerd built this guild, but treated me and Flavus like his own children. Flavus was who sat beside me, and like myself he was a half-elf. We’d grown up together under Ramerd’s control, he was like a brother to me and was even ready to kill our master for Taileth’s death. Ramerd wasn’t his favorite person and vice versa, but he continued to play nice anyways not just because Ramerd would beat him with an inch of his life if he didn’t, but also knowing that I wouldn’t be able to take Ramerd’s wraith towards him.

I continued to look down the table, noting who else was here, Leger and Lothar sat two seats down from me and across from each other, the two where twins and liked to kiss Ramerd’s ass. Vastrill and Arnulf didn’t care to kiss Ramerd’s ass nor cared to disobey him, they were the ones that were going to leave this godforsaken place once their debt was paid off. They never said it, but I knew it. The last two assassins in the hall were Drad and Bevin who sat at the end of the table, both were extremely quiet and only talked to each other, they were some of the first to be a part of Ramerd’s Guild and had even trained most of us “younger” assassins, all but Flavus and I. Ramerd wanted no one but him and Yrnar teaching us, and that was simply because we were the only younger halfling assassins.

“Did you have a nice swim?” Ramerd asked besides me, bring my attention back to him, a servant sitting goblets of wine some for the both of us. It was no surprise to me that he knew of my exact whereabouts, but that didn’t mean it didn’t bother me.

“Yes, I did, thank you for asking.” I hated the niceties, but I forced them out of my mouth anyways.

“I’m glad, seeing as you ripped a door of its hinges on your way out.” I hadn’t realized that I did that, but I didn’t let one ounce of surprise show on my face. “I’m occupying you on your next assignment in Belhaven.” Ramerd said as the same servant sat a plate of food in front of the two of us. “We leave in a week.”

“Why?”

He chuckled and brought a hand up to my face, a finger curling underneath chin and a thumb pressing into it, forcing me to look into his eyes. “Because I want to keep an eye on what’s rightfully mine.” I poured every ounce of my strength into not letting the displeasure that filled my body show, he chuckled again, knowing exactly what he was doing to me, toying with me. “Now eat dear, you’ll need your strength for what’s to come.”

He released my chin from his hold, and I moved my head down to face my plate. I picked up a fork and knife, willing my hands to steady as I stabbed the fork into the steak and begun cutting at the meat. A smile formed on my lips as I imagined the meat as Ramerd, every cut of the knife and stab of the fork calming the anger and disgust that found its home in my heart.

Once I was done and the meat in pieces, I punctured my fork into the meat once again, and looked up at Ramerd, meeting his icy eyes as I brought the steak to my mouth, a smirk still playing at my lips.

I’d let him see exactly what he wanted to see, an obedient monster, taking delight in her master’s orders.

If only he knew what kind of monster lay beneath my skin, waiting for her master to get a little too close to her cage, a mistake he wouldn’t see coming.

I chewed the piece of meat, my eyes sparkling in delight — delight that he thought was from following his orders, enjoying the food he commanded me to eat.

Oh, if only he knew just exactly how eager I was willing to play into his sick, twisted game.

— ‡ —

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a part four!


	4. I Never Thought I'd Be A Killer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> PSA IN THE END NOTES!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Geralt x assassin!reader / Geralt x half-elf!reader
> 
> Word Count: 3453
> 
> Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence
> 
> Song: Make Up Your Mind - Florence & The Machine
> 
> PSA IN THE END NOTES!!!

— ‡ — 

“Why is he going with you to Belhaven?” Flavus said from my bedroom, I wasn’t able to see his exact whereabouts because I sat in the bath in my bathing chambers.

“He wants to, and I quote, ‘to keep an eye on what’s rightfully mine.’” I grabbed a soapy rag and started scrubbing at my skin.

“I heard that, but why?” I heard the clatter of blades then the scrape of them on whetstone, he was sharpening blades.

I paused, starring into the cloudy bath water, and drummed my fingers on the side of the tub. “He smelt who I’d been seeing on me and lost his shit.”

The scrape of a blade stopped for a moment and then resumed. I draped the clothe on the tubs edge and lifted myself out of the water. I dried myself off, slipped a nightgown on, and walked into my bedroom. Flavus sat on the edge of my bed, sharpening one of my blades.

“You don’t have to do that for me.”

“I needed something to do with my hands, so I didn’t go and strangle the bastard.” I snort at his remark.

“Stop being so dramatic.” He stopped what he was doing and looked up at me. His skin was golden brown with hazel eyes to match, and his long dark hair was pulled back away from his face.

A smirk found its way on his lips, “Says the girl that was cutting and stabbing at her food tonight like it was the man himself.”

I shrugged and made my way toward my bed. “Was it that noticeable?”

“Honey, if they didn’t notice why you were cutting your food like that, they sure as hell thought you were insane, if not both.”

“Maybe I am.” I said as I got under the covers. “Now, I want to get some sleep, so are you going to stay here or leave?”

He turned to look back at me, blade and whetstone still in his hands. “I do something nice for you and this is the thanks I get?”

I raised an eyebrow as if I was saying 'and?’ He shook his head and got up, picking up the blades that sat beside him and placed them on top of my dresser, next to the rest of my blades. He blew out the candle on said dresser and then got in bed next to me.

“What are you going to do about you-know-who?” Flavus asked breaking the short-lived silence between us while referring to Geralt.

“I don’t know.” I scooted closer to him in the cold sheets, letting him wrap his arms around me, enveloping me in warmth as he pulled me towards his body.

“I hate that I can’t go with you.”

“I do too.” I reach my hand out for his, he took it, and gave it a squeeze.

“Goodnight Y/N.”

“Goodnight.” I closed my eyes and fell into a deep sleep filled with old memories.

— ‡ —

We had been on the road for two weeks and had another two weeks left of travel before we reached Belhaven. We stopped in Aldersberg even though there was plenty of daylight left to reach the next town. He had gotten two rooms at a more high-end inn in town and requested that I find a dress in the market that hid my weapons but still gave me ease of access to them, apparently there was some sort of big dinner that we were attending tonight. I wasn’t looking for anything extravagant like I normally would because one it was Aldersberg and two I had to travel with it - if I had known I needed to dress up for this trip, I would’ve packed one of my dresses that I owned along with some cosmetics because yes, I was that bitch.

After a long search I finally found a dress, it was a long black dress with bell sleeves and a hood to cover up my ears it also had intricate blue stitching to it that while moving in the light looked like the night sky. I was surprised to find such a beautiful dress in this shit hole, but I tipped the older woman a few more guldens than what was owed just for the beautiful stitching.

I now waited for Ramerd to get done getting ready, I had multiple knives strapped to me and hidden in little folds of fabric. He stepped out of his room, he eyes racking up and down my body, my skin crawled in disgust, but I played it off.

“You look ravishing my dear.” He pulled the dresses hood closer, so it not only covered my ears, but my face altogether, then held his arm out, I forced a smile on my face. “You’ll want to stay in the shadows tonight.”

“Thank you,” I place my hand in the crock of his arm, I could do this. He patted my hand, a smile settling itself on his face.

Instead of taking a carriage like I thought we would - we walked, which the place we were going was just up the street.

It was a larger and grander town house compared to the others in the city besides the Duke and Duchess of Aldersberg’s manor which stood at the top of a hill, overlooking the city.

Ramerd stopped before the front doors of the house and looked down at me, trying to make me feel small.

“I want you to remember dear,” He patted my hand, wickedness adding a sparkle to his blue eyes. “That if you don’t do as I say, I will make you watch as I skin the man you’ve been sleeping with alive and make you watch.”

I didn’t let a drop of fear show in my eyes or body, I was not going to give him that kind of satisfaction. I only nodded in response, wanting to get the night over with as quickly as possible.

He turned his head back towards the door and knocked, a smirk on his lips.

A butler opened the doors, he started to speak but Ramerd cut him off. “I’m here for an appointment with Rebrild Pard over some trading plans.”

The butler nodded and stepped aside, letting us in. He was trying to peak under my hood as sly as possible to see what the mystery girl’s face looked like, but I kept my head down. Thoughts were racing through my head about what this meeting could possibly be about. 

Rebrild Pard was a large weapons merchant in Rivia, he specialized in both silver and steel blades. I knew him and Ramerd were trade partners, but it was concerning for me because he never took anyone but Yrnar with him on meetings like this

We were led into an office towards the back of the house, a desk sat in the middle of the room, the man that sat behind it had pale skin, empty grey eyes, and lifeless, short blond hair. He was on the skinnier side, but still had muscle, and he was dressed in slacks and a light blue silk tunic, showing off his wealth - this must be Rebrild Pard. He motioned towards the two chairs that sat in front of his dress, the door shut behind us, the butler left after Pard told him to leave us in privacy. We sat in the two armchairs, Ramerd leaned back into it, making himself comfortable, but I kept straight up, not wanting to make it easier for the man to see my face. 

“May I know who’s under the hood?”

“No." 

The man let out a sigh through his nose and drummed his fingers on his desk. "I’m assuming since you brought her here with you, she’s allowed to hear what we’re to discuss?”

“Are you doubting my judgment Pard?” From the way his fingers froze, and his eyes widen, I know the look on Ramerd’s face was to kill.

“No… No.”

“Good.” I didn’t have to look at Ramerd to know he was smiling just by the tone of his voice. “Do you have my weapons?”

The man pulled out a trade book from a drawer in his desk, flipped a few pages, cleared his throat, and started to read from the pages. “Three hundred steel daggers, one hundred fifty steel long swords, one hundred silver swords, and eighty axes.”

Ramerd hummed, “Are they ready to travel to the Keep?”

“Yes, for one hundred thousand guldens.”

It felt like all of the blood had drained from my body, I knew Ramerd was regularly buying weapons, but at this extent… This wasn’t right.

Ramerd chucked, “I only brought ten thousand.”

It didn’t take a genius to figure out that this wasn’t a payment plan he paid off with time, I knew and from the reddening of Pard’s face - he knew too.

“We agreed on one hundred thousand six months ago.” He seethed, I couldn’t tell if it was stupidity or bravery for the way he was speaking to Ramerd.

“And now I’m telling you ten thousand.” Due to the tension in the air, I kept my back straight, body still - not daring to make the wrong move in fear of Ramerd.

Pard scoffed and shut the boom. “Then it all goes to Nilfgaard, seeing as they’re willing to pay the right price.”

“Kill him.” Ramerd ordered, not missing a beat. The air was now filled with the man’s fear as his eyes widened and turned to me.

“No, no, no, no. Please.” The man bagged, I looked over to Ramerd and when I met his icy blue eyes, I seen that he would not hesitate to kill Geralt if I didn’t follow through.

I turned to face the whimpering man again, hating the drowning feeling I felt. I kept my face stoic and grabbed a throwing knife from one of the folds of fabric. The man shot up from his chair, knocking it to the floor and turned to run for the door that was behind his desk. But before he could even get two steps away from his chair, I was on my feet and my knife lodged itself in between his skull and cervical.

And with a drop of a body, Rebrild Pard was dead.

I never cared to remember anyone’s name that I killed because in my opinion they didn’t deserve it - besides my first kill, and now I wouldn’t forget Rebrild Pard because he didn’t deserve it. I knew I killed people, but this was different.

I never truly felt like a killer until now. 

I wield numbness throughout my body as I stared at his body, I was not going to show Ramerd any type of weakness - of regret. I heard a sigh escape Ramerd’s lips as he stood up.

“It’s a shame, he was a damn good arms dealer.” I slowly dragged my eyes over the assassin master, he was straightening his sleeves, completely unaffected by the fact that I just broke his code. “Get your dagger and keep it out.”

He moved over to the door we entered through and I stepped over to Pard’s body, bent down and yanked the blade out. I stood to find Ramerd opening the door.

“Ladies first.” A devil of a grin found itself upon his lips, he hand gesturing towards the hall.

When I stepped out into the hall it was empty and silent, as if everyone in the house knew someone was dead and wasn’t going to dare to show themselves in fear of facing the same fate.

After shutting the office door, Ramerd started walking deeper into the house, and stopped in front of a single, dark wooden door. His large hand wrapped around the knob and opened it. It was another office, but smaller. A man that looked like Rebrild in the face but younger sat at a desk, a servant was placing a goblet of wine on the surface when we walked in. The servant girl looked up to see who had walked into the office. She took one look at the bloodied blade in my hand and disappeared through the servant’s door - smart. The man that sat at the desk didn’t look affected by mine and Ramerd’s appearance, it was Ramerd who spoke first.“

"My deepest condolences Adrik Pard, I regret to inform you of your uncle’s passing.” I wicked smile was on both of the man’s and Ramerd’s faces - Rebrild’s death was planned. “But despite his untimely death, a congratulations are in order seeing as you now control his empire.”

Adrik stood from his seat, “Thank you for taking the time out of your travels to bring me the news Ramerd, I shall reward you with whatever weapons my uncle was in the process of delivering to you at no cost out of a token of gratitude.”

A sticky smile was still on his face despite the news of his uncle’s death. I knew the conversation between them was for any prying ears - all of this made me sick.

“It is greatly appreciated, again I send my deepest condolences.” Adrik and Ramerd titled their heads in a farewell, he grabbed my wrist and lead me out of the room, closing the office door behind him. He turned to me, “Put your knife away.”

I did as I was told, hating the blood was getting on this dress, but I didn’t show him any disgust; I still didn’t when I slipped my arm in his waiting one. He didn’t say anything else as he led us out and I couldn’t decide if his silence was good or bad.

— ‡ —

That night, when the two assassins got back to their inn, the girl’s master had followed her into her room and grabbed her by the throat, shoving the door close as he slammed her body into it. The master’s lips were pulled back into a snarl, but the girl showed no fear despite the man cutting off all of her air. She didn’t show a fear until he brushed his teeth and lips against her ear giving a new promise.

“Seeing as the threat of killing your lover wasn’t enough, I’ll add Flavus’ death to the table too. This is my very last warning girl.”

He applied more pressure to her throat before throwing her to the side. Without so much as an ounce of regret, the man opened her door and slipped out, slamming the door shut on his way out.

Alarm bells went off in the girl’s head, terror shot down her spine, and dread filled her veins with his words. He’d never threatened Flavus’ life because like her, Flavus brought him in the majority of his money.

Y/N realized two things as she laid in the floor that night, the first being that if she were to win this war, she’d have to hand away her humanity. The second thing she realized that night was the reason why death was always following her, and it was because Ramerd Gamward was death and he was always following her every movement.

The girl slowly picked herself off the ground and lit a fire in the fireplace. She watched the flames build up as she stripped the mainly knives off her body - letting them clatter to the floor - and then her dress was off too. She balled it up and throw it into the flames, thinking that maybe she did deserve this emptiness and pain.

— ‡ —

“When do you think we’ll run into Y/N again, it’s been, almost two months… Normally we run into her by now.” The bard wondered while he walked besides the witcher into Aldersberg.

The witcher said nothing as he inspected the normally loud town that was now quiet, even Jaskier had picked up on the odd air that covered the town. 'Something had happened,’ Geralt thought to himself.

He tried Roach to a hitching post and followed Jaskier into a tavern. Whispers filled the bar, all that Geralt heard was about the assassination of Rebrild Pard from two days ago, about how the women and children were too scared to go outside in fear of the death that had visited the town two days ago would come back. 

Jaskier sat by a round, lone man whose face was just as red as his hair, Geralt reluctantly sat next to Jaskier who had begun talking to the man next to him.

“May I ask if you know what has happened here?”

The man grunted and took a sip of his ale, he didn’t say anything for the longest time Jaskier thinking he wasn’t going to get an answer from the man until, “My wife works at the Rosebud inn which is a block away from Rebrild Pard’s house.” The man paused and took another sip as Jaskier started to lean in towards the man. “Two nights ago, one of the maids that works my wife was working that night and the following day, Nele is her name. She said that Ramerd Gamward checked and a woman was along with him.”

The witcher’s hand froze midair, ale sloshed on the sides of the mug due to the sudden stop, the man paid no mind and kept on with his story.

“She said that while she didn’t know where to two disappeared that night, is was long enough to go to Pard’s house and murder him. She said that they came back in the clothes they left in, not a speck of blood on neither, but she said that when they came back anger, disgust, and death surrounded the air around the two. When they checked in, Nele seen the girls face, said she was the most beautiful woman she’d seen walk through the inn, but before dawn the next day Nele was doing laundry and accidentally ran into the woman, she caught a glimpse of her face and said she looked dead. Y/E/C eyes that were sparkling with anger were now red and held no emotion, she even seen a light bruising around the woman’s neck.”

Jaskier swore under his breath and Geralt’s blood boiled, but the man continued anyways.

“It was before dawn when they left, prior to when news broke of Rebrild Pard’s death. Nele feared for the girl’s life and even though I never seen her, I have to say the same.”

Before anymore was said, Geralt slammed the tankard of ale down on the counter and got up, nearly tipping the stool over in the process. The tavern was quiet as the witcher stormed out, Jaskier giving the man a quick thank you and followed after him.

Jaskier came out just in time to see Geralt untying Roach from the post.

“Where are you going?” Jaskier asked, putting his hands on his hips.

“After Y/N.” Geralt turned to start leading Roach down the street.

“Woah, woah, woah.” Jaskier stopped in front of Geralt, hands held up in the air. “How do you know that it was Y/N that was with him and not some other woman.”

“Because Y/N is the only woman in Ramerd’s guild.”

“Okay, but you don’t know where they’re headed, that man in there didn’t say where they were going.”

The witcher paused and studied the bard’s face while he thought about what he’d just said. Geralt opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by a hooded man and his horse storming down the street. Him and his horse stopped before Geralt, Jaskier, and Roach and sniffed the air - Geralt’s hand started inching toward a blade while Jaskier took a step away from the man.

“Are you Geralt of Rivia?”

“Who’s asking?” The witcher grunted, hand falling upon the hilt of a dagger. The man smiled, white teeth glowing from the darkness the hood gave him, which he then pulled back revealing pointed ears, golden eyes, and dark skin.

“Y/N said you were brash,” He pulled on his horse reins who wanted to continue running. “I’m Flavus, I’m sure my sister has told you about me like she has told me of you.”

“How is Y/N your sister?” Jaskier asked, eyebrows furrowed.

“They grew up together.” Geralt answered, not daring to break eye contact with the assassin. “Why are you here?”

Flavus’ smile dropped, a solemn but deadly expression was now on his face. “I was told Ramerd brought her along with him to kill anyone who gets in his way of his plans, but I also feel he’s doing it to break her in the process.”

Jaskier’s defensive stance faltered while the gears in Geralt’s head started turning.

“Where is he taking her?”

“Belhaven.”

— ‡ —

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, so I've been considering making this story available to members only because it's come to my attention that this app called Fanfic Pocket that has reuploaded not only my work and hundreds of authors works on AO3 and they are making profit off my work through ads, subscriptions, and "tips". The people behind Fanfic Pocket are making money off work that was published on this site for free and without our permission. And the thing is I've just learned about this today, 02/16/2020 and this app has been in existence since 2015. 
> 
> And I'm sure that there will be people that think I'm overrating but here's the thing, I spend days and weeks planning, researching, and writing my stories and I do all of this for free. I am a full time college student, I have little time to write these stories but I do it because I love doing it. So when someone publishes stuff that I've worked hard on and profits off it, not only is it disrespectful, but its insulting, and I feel like I'm being spit in the face by this person/people. AND EVERY SINGLE STORY I HAVE POSTED ON AO3 IS ON THAT APP AND IT IS THE SAME FOR OTHER AUTHORS WITHOUT OUR PERMISSION!
> 
> So if you are one of those people that uses the app, please stop
> 
> The last thing I want to do is make my work private because I want everyone to have access to my works.
> 
> Again I'm not 100% sure if this is what I'm going to do, but I would also like your opinions on whether I should make my stuff private or not.
> 
> But if you can, please let other authors on this site know about this and please report this app on both Google Play and the App Store.


	5. Taking Wings Off a Goddess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pairing: Geralt x assassin!reader / Geralt x half-elf!reader
> 
> Word Count: 5.4k
> 
> Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, very sad themes.
> 
> Song: Bad Dream - Ruelle / Wrong Direction - Hailee Steinfeld

— ‡ —

1137

My head laid on top of a hard chest. Brown eyes that belonged to the body I laid on were staring down at me in a loving way, an arm was lazily thrown over my waist, holding my body to his own.

Despite the war that loomed around the camp we sat up that night; I knew I was safe. Taileth's arms were home.

"What's going on in that pretty head of yours?" His chest rumbled beneath me as he spoke, fingers dancing at the nape of my neck, sending chills down my spine.

"That I don't want to leave your arms." A dark eyebrow rose along with a smirk on his lips.

"Is that so?" His fingers moved down my spine in light touches causing the hair to raise along with goosebumps while shivers racked through my body.

"Yes," I rasped out when his fingers stopped their dance and his palm flattening out on my lower back.

"And why's that?" He was toying with me, but I didn't mind it; it was welcomed.

I broke eye contact and looked down at his chest as I place a hand on top of it, right above his heart. I slowly dragged my eyes away from his chest and back up to his eyes. Holding eye contact, I leisurely lifted my hand to where only my fingertips gave a ghost of a touch against his skin. I could hear his heart speed up, but his facial features remained neutral besides the smirk on his lips.

"Are you going to tell me or just continue with your torture?" His voice was strained due to him trying to hold his resolve.

"You didn't seem opposed to torture when you were the one doing it." I hummed, moving my fingertips lower down his abdomen. 

He opened his mouth to speak but the jiggling of a lock broke apart the dream and reality sat in — this wasn't real.

Within seconds the dagger under my pillow was in my hand and I was sitting up in bed. Someone was picking the lock and while it wasn't loud, due to my elven hearing, I knew whoever it was, was experienced because it would've been inaudible to an ordinary human. I pulled the covers back and quietly stood up, my footsteps light and silent as I moved across the floor. I stood behind where the door would open and waited to attack.

The lock finally clicked, and the door slowly opened, a hooded figure stepped in. Without thinking, I moved swiftly, stepping towards the intruder, my dagger raised, and headed down towards their neck. With barely a blink of an eye, the figure spun around and a tanned, scar flaked hand was wrapped around my wrist, halting the movement of my dagger filled hand.

Pearl white teeth in a cruel, smiling mouth were the first things I saw as I studied the figure, then it was the icy blue eyes.

"I'm glad to see that you are still sharp on your feet." Ramerd Gamward chuckled before me. 

"Glad that I'm still of use to you." I couldn't help the bitterness slip through my tone as I yanked my wrist away from his grasp.

Another chuckle slipped from his lips, grey eyes sparkled as he reminisced, "You were always the worst when being woken up. I remember the time when the twins thought they were going to pull a nasty prank on you while you were asleep, the next day and the following month or so, they wouldn't so much as look at you, nor breathe when you were around. I never did find out exactly what you did to the two, they only told me what they'd planned to do that night and nothing else no matter what I promised them."

I didn't offer up any information but instead, I just blinked at him, a mask of boredom etched onto my face.

"I suppose I'm not going to find out anytime soon either." An amused smile was still taking over his lips as he took a step back and racked his eyes down my silk clad body. "Get dressed and packed, we're leaving in thirty minutes."

I didn't move or say anything as I watched him step out and close the door behind himself.

I took a moment to collect myself once I was alone then, I started packing with one thing on my mind.

I was so close to killing Ramerd Gamward.

— ‡ —

The dream of Taileth was still fresh on my mind six hours later. We had just reached Belhaven and it didn't take long being in town that pure, unadulterated fear shot down my spine when I caught the scent of the bard that followed the white wolf around.

I looked towards the direction of his scent to find the very person rounding a corner, blue eyes meeting my own as he did — Jaskier.

I tried telling myself that him and Geralt went their separate ways, but by the way his eye widened and the cheerfulness that was displayed on his body and in his step was now serious. That alone told me that he was looking for me, and if he was looking for me, Geralt was too.

I tightened my grip on Sonja's reigns, Geralt was here, and I had to act fast.

I broke my gaze with Jaskier and moved Sonja where the light breeze carrying his scent towards Ramerd was blocked by my body; not knowing or willing to find out if Ramerd knew it.

I swallowed the fear down and gained Ramerd's attention by clearing my throat.

"How long has it been since you've last been here? There's this new bakery and they have the most divine blueberry tarts; you would love them."

By the way his eyes shinned, I knew he knew I was up to something. A smirk found its way to his lips. "Lead the way."

I smiled, "Its down that way." I nodded my head towards the street opposite of the street Jaskier stood at, towards the rich side of town. I found myself thankful that he decided to humor me.

— ‡ —

Jaskier wasn't that fawned of Y/N, to Jaskier, it was like the woman lived to torture the bard. And Flavus wasn't any better, the only difference was while Geralt would let it Y/N get away with it, he would send warning glares to the male assassin.

While Flavus terrified Jaskier, he couldn't deny that the assassin wasn't beautiful and didn't know whether it was fear of the man or his attractiveness that made him weak in the knees. The bard couldn't decide either if the way the assassin's hazel eyes seemed to glow every time they landed on him was a good thing or if he should be running for the hills, because regardless of knowing that he was an assassin, he knew Flavus could crush him with his muscles.

And fuck those cheekbones...

Jaskier stopped in the middle of a street in Belhaven, was he just lusting over an assassin?

"Get out the way!" A child yelled, shoving Jaskier out of the way.

He took a step forward, ready to give the boy a piece of his mind when he was cut off by a woman running past Jaskier yelled at the kid but stopped and turned towards him.

"I'm so sorry, sir." From what he'd seen of the boy, the woman looked like the boy, and he figured she was either his sister or mother — he felt bad for her whichever it was.

"It’s quite alright." The smile that came to her face, made him smile himself.

"Again, I'm so sorry, but I've got to go after him to make sure he doesn't get in any more trouble." The woman rushed out the words as if she'd just remembered who she was apologizing for in the first place. Before he could say anything else, the woman was gone, running after the child. Jaskier shook his head, trying to shake out the thoughts of the child, the woman, and Flavus from his mind. He was not going to let them bring his mood down.

Jaskier rounded the corner to go to the town square in search of some food that wasn't from the inn he, Geralt, and Flavus were staying in.

He stopped in his tracks when he met the eyes of the very woman Geralt and Flavus had been searching for the last two weeks, his eyes widened.

Her presence was normally unnerving for Jaskier, but the look on her face and in her eyes brought a new type of fear to him. He'd never seen the assassin scared, not just scared but terrified as she looked at the bard. And while under normal circumstances, he would find delight in her looking at him in fear for once, and not the other way around, but this wasn’t a normal circumstance.

He didn't get a long time to gawk at her before she was turning away from him and turning her attention to the other rider and their horse, he didn't get a look of the other person because Y/N was moving Sonja to where they blocked his view of the man. Jaskier could only guess that the other person wasn't good news seeing as they were just as much of a shadow as Y/N by both attire and horse.

Once he got through his initial shock and Y/N and the other person had their backs to him — heading the other direction — it dawned on Jaskier that that wasn't just any other person, that was Ramerd Gamward.

Jaskier forgot about food and turned around, breaking into a run because he knew he had to tell Geralt and Flavus.

— ‡ —

"We arrived here yesterday, they were two days ahead of us, and neither are here in Belhaven." Geralt said, watching as Flavus paced back and forth in the assassin's room at the inn they were currently staying at. "Where are they?" 

Flavus stopped and looked at the witcher for a good moment, expression blank.

"I don't know." The assassin deadpanned and continued his pace. "But when they do come to town, we have to stay low, Ramerd knows what the both of us smell like."

"I can handle myself." Geralt grunted, his mind spun with all different types of possibilities as to why they weren't here yet as he headed towards the door, but Flavus stopped him doing so by grabbing him by the arm. Geralt growled and starred down the assassin who didn't look bothered by the witcher's stance.

"Has she told you about Taileth?"

Geralt stilled and furrowed his eyebrows, Flavus sighed. 

"Of course, she hasn't." The assassin moved to sit at the foot of his bed, his shoulders sank as he looked down at his feet. Geralt was surprised at how much emotion the assassin was displaying with only knowing him for a couple of weeks, but he guessed that assassin was just as desperate as he was.

"Who's Taileth?" Geralt spoke, now completely facing the assassin.

Before Flavus could hold an internal debate on whether he should tell the witcher exactly who Taileth was or not, someone was busting through the door causing the assassin to shot to his feet and the witcher to spin around, grabbing a blade in the process — both ready to face the new threat.

Jaskier stood before the two, huffing out air as if he'd just ran a marathon. 

"What the fuck Jaskier?" Geralt growled, watching as the bard doubled over to catch his breath, holding a finger up in the air, telling the two to wait a minute. Geralt couldn't help the sigh that left his lips as he tucked the knife back into its rightful place and crossed his arms over his chest, waiting for the bard to out with it.

Once Jaskier caught his breath, he stood straight up, and met the eyes of both the witcher and assassin.

"Y/N's here."

— ‡ —

"So, tell me dear, what have you been up to?" Ramerd asked, digging his fork into the tart.

"What do you mean, I've been at your side since we left the castle." I take a bite of the tart, acting unbothered by his question. He took a bite of the piece he dug out and hummed.

We sat outside the small, but expensive bakery in the upper-class side of Belhaven that I had told Ramerd about to keep his attention from Jaskier.

He almost looked normal while he ate his tart in the sunlight.

Almost. 

His normally pale skin was now tanned due to our travels — it made him look alive, his visible hair looked like fresh blood in the sunlight, his icy blue irises were now pale — almost translucent, and he had a leg propped up on one of the empty chairs at our table, looking relaxed. Instead, it was the dark cloak who's hood covered enough of his head to hide his pointed ears, his dark clothes that had blades strapped over them to his calves and hips, the air around him that sucked the life out of you if you got too close, the wickedness in his eyes and smile, and the way he moved like death that were all clear signs that he was anything but normal and not in the good way. 

We sat in silence for a good ten minutes eating our tarts, Ramerd basking in his so-called glow while some passing women swooned over him from the other side of the street. I didn't know whether or not to roll my eyes at the women or scream at them to run — run far, far away from him, but instead I kept my mouth shut and my eyes focused on anything that wasn't him.

Once no one was no longer paying any attention to the two of us, Ramerd moved his feet off the chair and straightened his body up to face me. All the amusement left his face and his voice got so quiet that my enhanced hearing could barely pick up his words.

"Andrzej Zysk has a job for you tonight."

"Where?" The question slipped out of my lips before I could put any thought in them, I hated how easy it was for me to ask the question — hated that I knew Andrzej Zysk's job was me assassinating him.

"His house." He took a sip of his wine, icy blue eyes still watching every movement I made. Silence sat between us for a bit, I sat and debated on whether or not if I should ask why I was killing Andrzej since Ramerd was now with holding that information from me. I took a large sip of wine to let the question slip through my lips.

"Why?"

The world almost seemed like it stopped around me as Ramerd's eyes darkened. I wanted to sink into my chair and disappear, but I kept still because I was not going to wave the white flag for him. A dangerous smirk spread across his lips; chills ran down my spine at the sight before me.

"You'll find out once you do the job," He stood up. "Let's go."

It was an insertion of dominance, something he has done since he found out about Taileth 113 years ago. He never declared what kind of relationship he wanted from me, but I knew that whatever it was considering his need to constantly remind me that he was in charge of me, I didn't want it.

— ‡ —

Of course, a thunderstorm had to hit tonight while I had an assignment. My body was pressed up against the wall of Andrzej Zysk's house, even though my cape helped keep me hidden, the shadows the house offered helped me a lot more. I watched as lightening lit up the sky that was even visible through the sheets of rain that poured down over Belhaven. Despite it being the devil’s hour and everyone should be asleep, the rain helped keep everyone inside — everyone besides me, and I was drenched to the bone.

I scanned the area around once more before I made my way up to the window of Andrzej's bedroom, one that I was for sure about do to watching him get ready for bed and close the window to, all of this right before the storm hit.

Once I felt like it was clear, I slowly made my way up the drainpipe, using the brick wall as leverage due to the rain making everything slick and harder to get a grasp on. I bit back hisses of pain as my nails break from digging them into the brick and the dirt that slid into the wounds left behind from my broken nails. I finally get to the second floor window and climb up onto its sill, I lightly push and pulled against the window hoping that it was unlocked, but found that it wasn't — I knew the reasoning behind was because of the storm but that didn't stop me from damning the lock to hell. I just wanted to get this over with and take a nice warm bath.

I leaned my back against one side of the window's frame and brought my legs up to my chest so that there was enough room for me to work on the lock. I pulled out a thin blade and shoved it in between the window's doors. Despite the storm making everything ten times worse, I found myself thankful for it because it hid the sound of my knife scraping between the windows — looking for the latch. About midway up the crack, my blade caught the lock. I brought my ear closer to the area to make sure my movements were quiet as I lifted the hook that kept the window shut.

Lightning struck and thunder followed shortly after, covering the sound of the hook banging against the wooden panel of the window’s door. I made quick movements to take the blade out and tuck it back into its home on my calf. I lightly pushed my finger against one of the doors, hoping that it swung inwards instead of outwards, but I was met with resistance.

If it weren't for the killing calm that I had sat my body and mind it, I would've cried out of frustration, but instead I slowly got to my feet. My body shook because of the tension in my muscles as I slowly and carefully heaved myself up against the pouring rain and wind, my fingers dug back into the brick, the pain sending shocks of pain down my arm, but I pushed through it not wanting to face Ramerd with a failed assignment. 

When I finally stood at my feet on the window sill, I paused and leaned against the frame to stop the shacking in my legs — it had been a very long time since I've had to climb a wall in these conditions and I cursed myself for not keeping up with this part of my training.

I slowly pulled one of the window's doors open once the trembling of my body stopped. I peeked into the room to find a tall, pale man with light blond hair asleep a bed across the room, whom I assumed was Andrzej, and listened for anyone else, but only heard one heartbeat and that was his own. I swiftly swung my body into the room, my feet softly falling to the floor, and I turned around to shut the window behind me. Once the window was shut, I made my way across the room, slipping out the blade strapped to my thigh, the only sounds being made it the room was the beat of the rain against the house, my cape lightly dusting the floor, and Andrzej's breathing and heartbeat.

As I approached his bedside and positioned my dagger to push it through his heart, I didn't let my mind dwell on the fact that his breathing and heart was about to stop, but instead I willed my mind to think about the angle my blade needed to be at so it didn't hit bone along with the force that was needed to drive my blade through his diaphragm and into his heart — how quick I needed to be so that I caused him little pain. I even went as far as to remind myself that if I were to slit his throat, that would put him in even more pain.

I took a deep breath and as I exhaled, I put my weight behind the blade and pushed in. Even with me making it quick, Andrzej woke. His eyes shot open and a gasp of pain and shock left his lips as he tried to sit up, but the weight that I put into the blade going through his chest kept him down. His eyes were a bright and warm green that were filled with fear and pain. Normally, that look in people’s eyes didn't bring any type of sadness to my thought or my eyes, but this time guilt and sorrow slammed against me like a wall of water and pulled me under. My heart hurt as his hand wrapped around my blood soaked hand.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered, a tear fell from my eyes, and my knees gave out causing me to sit down on his bed.

"Why?" His voice was strained as the life drained from his body. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out because I didn't have an answer for him or myself. "Why?"

"I... I don't know." The words tumbled out of my mouth and fuck did I hate myself for giving him that answer, I wanted to give him the real reason behind why I was killing him, but I couldn't because I truly didn't know. Anger flashed in his green eyes and I hated myself even more because of it, he deserved an answer. Before I could even think to elaborate, his hand fell from my own and onto his bed, warm green eyes now cold as the life left them, a breath of air left his body once I heard his heartbeat stop.

I slowly pulled the dagger out from his chest; I've never hated the feeling and sound of one of my weapons leaving someone’s body as much as I did in this moment. With a clean and shaking hand, I reached to close his eyes and stood up, swallowing the pain, regret, and guilt down because I had to leave. I wiped the blade off with my cape and slid it back into its rightful place as I moved to the window.

I took one more deep breath before opening the window and jumping out into the storm and doing a three-point land. I didn't even bother with climbing down the drainpipe knowing full well that the elf in me would keep me from harming myself as my body hit the ground. Water and mud splashed up around me once I landed.

As I stood up and walked away from the crime I just committed, I found another reason to be thankful for the rainstorm and it was because it hid the tears that fell from my eyes.

I headed for the edge of town, not wanting to go back to my room just yet — not wanting to be anywhere around Ramerd or anyone for that matter, especially not with myself.

— ‡ —

I had ended up wondering into the forest along the outskirts of Belhaven. The rain had stopped and I had just slid my back down the trunk of a tree to sit on one of its roots when the snap of a tree branch to my left about ten meters out and my hearing picked up on a slow, quiet heartbeat.

By the time I got back on my feet with my sword in hand the intruder was visible to me and when I seen who it was, I wanted to disappear.

"Y/N," Geralt sighed, shoulders dropping out of relief. He moved where there weren’t any plants that stood between the two of use, so close that I picked up the faintest scent of Flavus that caused my blood ran cold. His amber eyes scanned over my body and stopped to look at my left hand that was once covered in Andrzej Zysk's blood. I had gotten the majority of it off, enough that anyone passing wouldn't think I had murdered someone, I knew that he couldn't see the blood, but I knew he smelt it. "What happened?"

"You have to go." I told Geralt, he clenched his jaw, glowing eyes moving back to mine. "You all have to go."

"I'm not scared of him, Y/N." 

"You should be," The urge to step towards him was strong, but I pushed back against it by taking a step back. "He knows when to attack someone at their weakest. He'll wait until your guard is down, he sees it as a game, Geralt. He hates losing and this game he's playing, he knows what cards to play and how to win like he knows the palm of his hand."

"And what am I supposed to do then, watch as he rips you apart from the inside out?" He hissed the words; anger hardened his facial features even more so than normal. I knew he wasn't angry at me, but at the situation because I was too. He took a step forward and I took another back, my back pushing into the tree I was just sitting against moments ago.

"I have a plan." I couldn't stop the tears building up in my eyes at the mention of it.

"And how much of yourself are you going to give up for this plan of yours?" His voice softened at the words and it broke my heart more than it already was.

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter, it matters to me." He took another step, his chest brushing against mine.

"Geralt, please." I ignored the crack in my voice as I risked laying my hand against his chest, his large hand engulfed mine as he laid his own on top of it. "I have to do this on my own."

A tear escaped and started to roll down my cheek, but he caught it before it got too far.

"You are important to me." He placed both of his hands on either side of my face, knocking the hood back in the process while tilting my head so my lips were barely brushing against his own, his scent of leather and the faintest smell of sandalwood that was probably from the last bar of soap he used filled my senses. He leaned his forehead against my own and closed his eyes, he didn't say anything else, just stood there. I followed suit in closing my eyes and took him in like I knew he was with me. 

We stood like this for so long that the wildlife slowly came to life around us, finally coming out now that the storm was over, I wished I could say the same for myself because I knew the storm wasn't over for me, instead I was standing in the eye of it even with the fact that my head has yet to break the surface since that wall of water has yet to let up. I knew the moment that I when I was back in the storm, it would hurt like hell, more so than it already was. 

And gods above, I could still smell Andrzej's blood on me, feel his blood under what was left of my chipped nails.

I didn't even realize that warm tears were falling down my frozen face until Geralt's thumbs were wiping away the tears and before I could open my eyes back up to look at him, he was moving my head to his chest, holding me against his body.

It wasn't just my face that was ice cold, but my whole body, and I didn't realize it until he wrapped me up in his warm embrace.

My knees started to buckle, but he caught me and picked me up bridal style. He slowly turned around and slid down the back of the tree I was previously against and continued holding me while my entire body leaned against his, just like I was leaning against Andrzej's window earlier. But this time, the chance of falling 15 feet wasn't a possibility, I wasn't about to kill someone, and I was safe.

"What happened?" His chest rumbled under my head as he finally broke the silence that settled between us ever since he placed his forehead against mine.

I moved away from his body where I was now straddling his lap so I could look in his amber eyes, scared to tell him because I wasn't ready for him to run, not now when I needed him. I knew I told him over a year ago that I was a monster, but I also knew he didn't believe me then. But that was then, there were lines that hadn't been crossed and now they were almost nonexistent due to going so far over then, especially after tonight. There was no coming back from that.

"Y/N, tell me." His voice was still soft, but I didn't miss the slight demand in the undertone of his voice.

"No."

"Why?"

"Because I don't think I could handle you looking at me like I am one of the monsters you slay." There was a sadness in his eyes I've never seen directed at me after those words spilled from my lips, then they hardened and he grabbed my chin between his thumb and forefinger, making sure I was looking into his yellow eyes.

"Nothing you do or say will make me look at you like that because you are not a monster despite what you believe." He let go of my face and took both my hand and the wolf medallion that hung around his neck and pressed it into my palm, my glaze now rested on his large hand wrapped around my smaller one. "If you were a monster, you wouldn't be able to hold this — let alone touch this — and you can." With his free hand he curled a finger underneath my chin, tilting it so I'd look back at his eyes. "That is how I know you are not a monster."

I held his glaze for what felt like eternity and then I finally told him everything. I told him about how and why I killed Rebrild Pard, the reason why we were two days late to Belhaven was because Ramerd wanted stop by a small town and used me to threaten a man named Tozre to make sure he was still going through with a trade I still had no idea about. And then finally, I told him about Andrzej Zysk. I told him how I cried and apologized to him while I watched him die. How he asked me why I was killing him and I didn't have an answer because the very person that told me to kill him wouldn't give me one and all I was able to tell the man on his death bed that I didn't know. I told him all of this with tears streaming down my face and sobs taking over my body every time I recalled the horrors I committed in the past two weeks. I kept going even when there weren't any more tears left to cry. By the time I was finished with it all, my voice was hoarse from the crying, and I was so mentally and emotionally drained that it was hard keeping my reddened eyes open.

He didn't say anything, just lifted my hand that was still holding his medallion and wrapped up in his own hand to his lips. He moved his hand surrounding mine just enough so that his lips met the skin on my hand, the whole time his eyes never left mine.

"Still not a monster. Okay?" He squeezed my hand, the silver medallion biting into my hand as a reminder that I was still holding it.

"Okay." I nodded my head and leaned the side of it against his shoulder where I could look and watch the forest around us. He let go of my hand and wrapped both of his arms around my body, my hand resting on his chest, still clutching the medallion. 

Regardless of Geralt's words, one thing became very clear to me after tonight's events: Ramerd Gamward was the God of Death, and he was making it very clear that I was its mistress whether I could live with it or not. 

— ‡ —

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There will be a part six!
> 
> I don’t know when I will exactly post part six because I have a huge essay due April 7th and I don’t plan on touching this until after I get that finished. I also don’t know how long it’ll be until I update due to what is currently going on with the pandemic and I’m also getting to that point where I’m going to start working on wrapping up this story. I’m not 100% sure on how many more parts there will be as of right now, I know there will for sure be at least seven, but will most likely get moved up to eight, this does not count the epilogue.
> 
> Thank you so much for taking the time to read this and everyone please stay safe and social distance yourself to help slow the spread of COVID-19!


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